Happy AANHPI & APIDA Heritage month! All month, I’ll be featuring phenomenal humans from the Asian diaspora, along with a snapshot of their creative work. Each of these friends is someone I treasure deeply and think you should know, learn from, support, and follow.
Meet Angela Hoover.
Mixed Ink
by Angela Hoover
My sister and I were looking through old family passports a few months ago, trying to determine exact dates to verify some obscure bit of family lore. Where some parents keep mementos like their child’s first lost tooth or lock of hair from the first haircut, mine kept our passports. As the child of an American father and a Filipino mother, these little books are not merely an official account of our family travels, but a journal of heritage that goes beyond the American borders where we reside.
As we flipped through the pages, running our fingers over the ID photos pasted into the front cover and visa stamps embossed into the thick leaves of each diplomatic ledger, we found this stamp towards the front of Mom’s first passport:
“PHILIPPINES IMMIGRATION. DEPARTED AUG 20, 1986.”
We both stopped, suddenly feeling the weight--the significance--of this particular stamp, the chunking of rubber and ink on paper by the immigration officer sealing this moment in time. Those purple block letters symbolized the first time she would ever leave the Philippines and the last time she would be a citizen in the land of her birth. From that point forward she would become a wife, a mother, an American citizen—always remaining a daughter of her culture, but forever changed by two suitcases and an exit stamp.
Without that stamp, without my mother’s leap of faith to marry a man across the sea known only through mutual friends, letters, and phone calls, I would not be here; the unique makeup of my DNA and life experience simply would not exist. There’s no alternate, parallel universe where I am either American or Filipino—I am wholly “me,” right here, right now, only by being this exact blend of both.
Admittedly, being mixed race has made me the odd one out in nearly every context I’ve found myself— whether growing up in rural Indiana, visiting family back in the Philippines, or living and traveling overseas throughout my career. No matter where I am, half of me always seems to belong somewhere else. I’ve been “too Asian” for some people and “not Asian enough” for others; “too American” in one circumstance and “not American enough” in another. I’ve been told both, “I don’t even see you as Asian!” and “Well, I only think of you as Filipino!” by well-meaning friends hoping to elevate one half of me, yet unintentionally and inevitably erasing my other half.
But for as much as I have been misunderstood, misidentified, or misrepresented, I would not trade my uncommon life for any other story. I wouldn’t wish away that stamp in my mom’s passport for all the riches in the world. I am tied to those islands by blood and history; I am tied to this nation by life journey and birthright. Both the Philippines and the United States are part of me, no matter what assumptions people have. And for every person who only seems to perceive half of me, there have been countless more who value the whole of who I am.
Because above all, I am indelibly marked with the stamp of God, who decided to mix two inks together when making me. My ultimate citizenship is in heaven, where my name, my heritage, my inheritance is permanently inked—never erased. All who belong to Jesus share in this eternal citizenry. No matter where your parents, grandparents, or great-grandparents may have departed from, no matter where bloodlines may have crossed or cultures mingled, there’s room at the table in the kingdom of God for every tribe, tongue, and nation—and everyone in between.
Angela Hoover is based in rural northeast Indiana, at the intersection of One Cornfield and Yet Another Cornfield. She scribbles about things she observes in the world, on the web, and in the Word. When she's not writing, you'll most likely find her somewhere outdoors and at-large. Her first self-published work, Miles Into the Blue: Essays on life, God, and wandering the world can be purchased through her website, www.AngelaAtLarge.com.
Find and follow Angela here:
Website: www.AngelaAtlarge.com
Instagram: @AngelaAtLarge_author
Substack: @AngelaAtLarge
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